Tuesday, December 2, 2008

Never Thought I'd be in Agreement....

I know that most of the Gods I come in contact with and a lot of the Earths I come in contact with are against marriage. I am not against marriage, but I don’t feel the need to be married either. I have been married before so I am able to form my opinion from experience rather than observation. But this blog is not about cohabitation vs. marriage.

The main argument I hear against marriage is that you don’t want the government all up in your business. My rebuttal to that is that the government is already all up in your business. You have a birth certificate, you probably went to public schools, you have a social security number, you have filled out a W2 form, you have a driver’s license, pay taxes, have student loans, etc. The government is already thoroughly up and through your isht. But the above link is disturbing.

Covenant marriage. WTH? Okay if marriage is coming to this then I’m all for cohabitation. The difference between this and regular marriage is that you would agree from the onset to terms that would make it more difficult to get divorced. But you can choose whether or not to get this type of marriage or the standard type. Why can’t you have regular marriage with that understanding?

I agree that it is very easy for folks to become unmarried. I’m not going to lie, while I was married, I kept in mind where I could get an uncontested divorce for $400 and on the DL at that. My late husband kept a gun in his night stand. He said it was for protection but he’d only look that direction when we argued. As Chris Rock once stated, “You ain’t really in love if you have never thought and planned how to kill your spouse and cover it up. And the only thing that stopped you was an episode of CSI.”

All jokes aside, lawful marriage should be standardized and not differ from family to family. This is another reason why people get heated over gay marriage. My personal opinion on gay marriage is I’m neither for nor against it. I’m not gay and I have no business telling gay people how to handle their business. But again, I digress, but not really.

Folks do not have the right to tell grown people how to do something that’s totally optional as long as other people don’t have to ante up any cash. And I found this concept and link by following a Republican thread! Those jokers speak out of both sides of their mouths. They claim that they are for less government but find away to get involved personally with a lot of personal foolishness. In order to qualify for this, folks must have premarital counseling. What bodies give premarital counseling? You guessed it…. Churches! Think about it from a practical standpoint… Folks who aren’t married yet, don’t have joint insurance. So getting counseling from a psychiatrist or psychologist who could sign off on the marriage would be expensive, unnecessary and irritating. And if you aren’t being pushed by your church to do this what would be the motivation to sign up for this? I don’t personally know anyone who goes through the expense and rigamarow to have a wedding, set up a household and have children just to say one day… “I’m out!” for no reason.

Don’t people think that marriage should actually break up sometimes? Sometimes you get unhappy and/or grow apart. I don’t see the point in continuing in that arrangement. Your spouse might decide to have gender re-assignment or join a cult. Those are pretty much deal breakers. But the covenant marriage only allows dissolution due to abuse, felony or adultery. That’s it. And now you are joined by the hip to a person for the rest of one of your natural lives. I bet there is fine print. I bet that there is punishment for the party that commits the crime that invalidates the marriage. And how is this covenant marriage supposed to guarantee that an actual marriage exists? My own parents were legally separated for 20 years before they got divorced. Hell, they made me during the separation and each had other relationships. But they had all the qualifications for a covenant marriage.

I’m proud of you if you’ve read this far. I am rambling. But trying to keep this cerebral without injecting a whole lot of emotion is trying, yet I persevere. The constitution of this country clearly separates church and state. That applies to everybody. Now we know that the government is not always on the up and up and they lie, steal and cause trouble amongst people, but the Constitution… that document, that has supposedly held this country together since its founding, says that the government is NOT allowed to force religion on people. This covenant marriage is some bull because this is an open door with which political and religious fanatics can force their foolishness on the masses. Look at the states where it is getting on the ballots: California, Florida, Georgia, Indiana, Iowa, Kansas, Maryland, Minnesota, Mississippi, Missouri, Nebraska, New Mexico, Oklahoma, Oregon, South Carolina, Tennessee, Texas, Utah, Virginia, Washington, and West Virginia. It’s already law in Louisiana, Arizona and Arkansas. The Bible belt and the mid west. These are people that the Republicans consider the “Real Americans.” They should have learned form the most recent election… No body lives in those states.

The bottom line is… Don’t allow this foolishness to happen! People who want to be together for the rest of their live s will be. They don’t need a difficult divorce to force them together. Then when you look at couples who have been married for a long time and instead of being awed at their commitment you will just say, “Ain’t like they can do anything about it.” If you see this issue on your ballots, shoot it down. I’m not only speaking to non-religious people, but all people. We need to be mindful of maintaining our personal freedom and expression of such. What’s right for some folks is not right for everybody and other folks don’t get to make determinations for gown people.