How doth thy soul propser?

My family is Christian. I was raised Christian. And just like most people who were blind deaf and dumb when they where babies, I believed what I was told by the people in power (parents, family friends, teachers, etc.). Even though I was given that information in a certain fashion, didn’t mean that I processed it in the way they wanted. I didn’t. I didn’t know that I was processing off the grid either. I thought everyone saw it the way I did. This was my error… and theirs.

I never believed that GOD was this altruistic, beneficent loving grandfatherly entity that was concerned about me. There were too many people out there who suffered that believed in GOD. But churches will tell you that its not GOD… It’s them. They did something that GOD is punishing them for. So you know where the concept of GOD’s grace and forgiveness went for me, right?

I believed that GOD was neither male nor female. That in order for GOD to be omnipotent, It could not have a body. Like air. Also, Prayer seemed stupid to me. Prayer just seemed like a way to vent. Think about it… if GOD is so powerful and already “knows your heart” then why would one need to pray to share what’s on your mind? Does that make sense? And what kind of all powerful entity can be swayed by prayer, fasting and whatever? Your GOD can be pimped?

So why did I go to church as long as I did? Many reasons. My old Earth is and always has been a holy roller. People in her cipher go to church; her church. Cased closed. Oh you can say what you want about being “your own person”, but that’s for folks whose mother was not that important to them as was/is mine to me. It is this blogger’s opinion that if you truly love and respect people, you don’t want to see them disappointed, upset or hurt. Truth be told…. I am still a little scared of her. I liked the fellowship of church and I love to sing (and am not bad at it). And church, done right, can be a vehicle for community empowerment. I married a man whose beliefs mimicked my mother’s. So I went to church with him. We moved away from our family and friends and then he returned to the Essence. That left me for the first time in charge of how I disperse my Energy.

One of the many inconsistencies about church that irks me to madness is how folks manipulate the Bible. Jesus…our righteous brother… the hardest working zombie in all of history… did not teach Christianity. Paul, who was never a disciple of Jesus, actually initially persecuted the Christians, claimed to have astrally met Jesus on that Damascus road, (if I made the same claim, could I start my own religion?) brought what it is that we know as Christianity. This is all very incorrect. Jesus was a Jew teaching Jewish reform. But let me get on with this and not get sidetracked. Christians pull out the scripture (Romans 12:2) that reads “Be ye not conformed to this world; but transformed by the renewing of your mind…” Conforming is what Christians want you to do. If you have your own thoughts on Biblical issues, even if you have a divine epiphany, you are libel to become excommunicated. That sounds like conforming to me. And why does excommunication even exist in an organization that is supposed to bring salvation to the masses? I cee that scripture as meaning that we should be striving to come into knowledge of self. But that doesn’t fill the coffers of the church now does it? I’d like to pair the Romans scripture with Proverbs 4:7 “… and with all that getting, get understanding.” It’s the best part.

This Christmas season prompted the writing of this blog. I ran into a woman that I used to church with. She is no different from any other previous church person I meet. Instead of inquiring about my health, career, life, any damn thing; they want to know where I worship. The answer that instantly jumps into my head is Bedside Baptist, but I don’t say that. I take it to be the end of our conversation. But as always in parting they offer to pray for me. That always makes me smile. Not because I am happy to be prayed for, or that I’m gonna break out into a spirited rendition of “Somebody Prayed for me/Had me on their mind/Took the time to pray for me…. (told you I liked the singing part) but because it’s a mirror showing me my freedom from that type of foolishness. I suppose I could enlighten them on a few issues, but they have been trained not to hear. And why cast my pearls before swine?

Peace