Tuesday, May 27, 2014

Universal Relationships


This month I said I was going o recite 120 everyday. And everyday this month has found me in degrees. I will admit that some days I had so little time that I just read them over from my book of life. That counts. When you read something you already know, you recite them while you read.

As always, when going through these degrees, things jump out at you and you see something new. The things that have been floating through my mental mind are the Solar Facts…

No one usually ever builds on Solar Facts, but all degrees are in fact build-worthy. Usually the planets… not including the Earth… in the lesson set, are used as derogatory comments for women who aren’t acting like Earths. I have heard people refer to women who they consider overbearing as “Jupiter.” And they mean it as an insult. This got me thinking…. I am and have been and will continue to be all of these planets at one or another to various and sundry men.

Follow me on this example….Original men are considered the “Sun” and Original women are “Earth.” The only way the Sun:Earth dynamic is applicable is if they are in a romantic relationship. What about other Original women that have some type of relationship to a Sun? We all have other people we associate with, other than our paramours.

All these attributes are applicable to Serenity: woman, female, widow, girlfriend, daughter, sister, niece, employee, coworker, friend, enemy, customer, stranger etc. The ONLY person that I should have a 93 million mile orbit relationship with, is my man. Should I be rotating around other men with the same mileage? Should my Original male coworker get the same accoutrements as my man? Should my brother, father or uncle? What about my friends? The answer is no.

When I was a child I was Mercury. I was so deeply enamored with the men in my life I would follow them everywhere and believed anything they told me. That’s what little girls do. They keep close to their male caretakers. And they should. Even to this day, if the surviving male relatives want or need me to do something for them, I’m right there. Quick fast and in a hurry.

When I get in a new relationship… I’m Venus. We all are (female and male). We put our best foot forward to strive to impress. That usually translates for women that we take extra effort to appear beautiful to these men and do things we KNOW we aren’t going to do should the relationship take hold and become long term. But just like Venus has the opposite rotation to most of the other planets, we know that that is a dysfunctional, though necessary phase that we all go through. Behaving other than self will not last.

I have already mentioned that I am Earth to my Sun… But occasionally he pisses me off and I drift 49 million miles out and become Mars. Then that shit gets interesting.

I have plenty of nieces and nephews and other smaller people that I mentor. To those people who are dependant on something I have to give, I am Jupiter. Many say that Jupiter is a failed star, but often failure is necessary for you to blossom at your true calling. All mothers and caretakers are Jupiter.

To my good friends, I’m Saturn. There is not a person on Earth who knows everything about me. My family knows a lot of who I am, but they don’t know everything. The God doesn’t know everything either. I learned a long time ago to keep parts of myself from certain people. The people with whom I share a Cipher, know the least about me in the scope of friendships. I only tell people what they need to know for a given situation. And that is Saturn… A mysterious planet. I don’t set out to be mysterious but I find it happens.

As I carry out this metaphor, I hope you notice that the further away from the sun, the cooler the relationships get.

To people I strongly dislike, I’m Uranus. Uranus appears to have a crazy rotation. That planet appears to “roll” on it’s axis rather than “spin.” It also orbits the opposite directions of all the other planets. Does not that describe the relation between people who don’t like each other? You can only be enemies with people you once had friendships. Remove the “R” from friend and you get “fiend.” There is nothing wrong with the planet Uranus itself. It is comfortable in it’s own orbit and it does what it does for itself. But to outsiders it’s different and conflict arises from different.

To people who are essentially strangers, yet I have regular dealings I am Neptune. Neptune is still a gas giant so it’s a significant relationship. They Know who I am by name but rarely much more. Employers tend to be people you have that relationship with, but they don’t actually know who you really are as a person. The gas giant comes into play because I am completely dependent on my employer for money as he dependant on me for the work I do. Employers know the work you. My boss has never heard how I actually speak when I am relaxed, because I never relax around him. My work voice is so different than my personal voice, when someone calls me at work they don’t believe it’s me. I have a whole set of things that are specifically set aside for the job. I have “work” clothes vs. at home clothes. We all do. My boss knows who I am Monday-Thursday from 7:30 to 5. That’s it. No more. There is no level of mystery to our relationship because I don’t care that much and neither does he. I want my paycheck, and he wants the profession. Does either of us care how the other one is feeling? Only so much that it affects the job or on my side the paycheck.

A Pluto relationship is reserved for strangers. And that is right and exact. If I don’t know you, I don’t need to be close to you. Well serenity, how can “strangers” be considered part of your Universe? They can and can’t. People that you ride the buss with, people you work on the same floor but don’t know their names, people that you see everyday but you don’t know. Those people are still part of your Relationship Universe. And they may not even see you as a planet as Pluto isn’t considered a planet currently to the scientific community.

So there you have it. I am rotating all over the Universe in different relationships with different men. It’s is as it should be… as it always is.


Thursday, May 15, 2014

Small Changes....

*** This is a long one. So you may want to print it to paper and read it when you have time. Like on the train or in the bathroom. Lunch reading. Last time I checked it was up to 4 pages! Just so you know***


It seems to me that the art of consistently changing your life occurs in a series of small steps rather than big ones. I’m not saying big changes won’t alter your life. If you develop cancer, lose a limb or a spouse your life will change forever in a big way. But that is more reacting than being proactive with change. The small ones are the ones that have lasting power.

Have you ever seen people trapped in their own lives? People who go to work and come home scared to venture out of their daily routines? People who are afraid to try ANYTHING new. People who have accepted that what they have is all they are ever going to have and made peace with it. They make comments like, “Well if I haven’t tried it by now, I don’t need to.” And my favorite, “Black people don’t do that.” I can’t stand those small minded, small thinking people. I try not to share air with them. Seriously I will hold my breath or get of the elevator. I don’t want any of their essence within me.

I am a COMPLETELY different person than I used to be just 10 years ago. I look different. I do different things. I live in a different place. I wear different clothes. I eat different food. And I am not done. I expect to be in a different place in the next 10 years and different still 10 years after that and so on….

I used to be a scared and sheltered Christian who listened to everything my mother and pastor told me to do. I kinda fell in to that pattern because of trauma that happened when I was a teenager. Up until I was 17 I was free spirit. I went and did what I wanted but stayed barely within the parameters of what was expected so I wouldn’t get in trouble. I was (and am still) the queen of arguing the point of I did what I was supposed to. 2 things happened that burst my bubble…. My mother entered menopause and I got an abusive boyfriend

Those 2 situations put and locked me into a box where all I could do was beg the mystery god to make it all better. Since I religion at home and at school, I forced myself to be less of a free spirit and more devout. But guess what. The situation never changed. But graciously, I went away to college. Distance was a good thing.

In college, I became a little more free… but not completely. The most valuable lesson I learned in college was that it was up to me to become the person I wanted to become. I could not look to another person to guide me. If I did then I would become the person that person wanted me to be; and that wasn’t necessarily what I wanted to be.

My first independent decision was my career choice. I wanted to be a doctor, but not a medical doctor. I had worked in a hospital around people who died and knew that I didn’t want to be involved in a career where that was a looming possibility. The only other ‘doctors’ I knew where dentists, vets, and eye doctors. So I have a career of my own choosing.

Next questionable choice I made was to fast. Grad school was no joke. It sucked all the color from my life. I was not doing well (testing panic) and I needed to clear my mind and settle down. Inspiration came upon me to fast before tests. And it was just that… inspiration. It centered me so that I performed better. I was no great scholar in grad school like I had been in previous educational settings. But the fasting made me a solid student. I graduated on time and I found a way to cope with large stress. I find fasting to be centering; I could focus on the task at hand. It worked so lovely that I made it something that I did on a weekly basis and later in life long term fasting.

Next big choice was to become a vegetarian. That was a rough choice because (a) I didn’t know other vegetarians, and (b) I was going to be the only person in any of my ciphers to live this lifestyle. I made the decision because I was idiopathically unhealthy and after a lot of research and doctor’s visits, it seemed to be a way that I could heal. Why was this a thing? All the people around me swore I was trying to commit suicide via eating disorder. My mother tried to have me committed. (My mother has been trying to have me committed all of my childhood. Doctors have always told her that I’m normal, but she still tried…) My husband supported me, (though was a bit weirded out at my mother’s reaction) but only with his words. I became a vegetarian by myself. And this was before the internet. I had to figure out things on my own. I tried a lot of new and different recipes. Now I have an entire repertoire.

Next independent choice I made was to stop perming my hair. I had gone perm free in grad school but under braids. I said it was because it saved time on my hair so I could focus on school. But I knew it could be done. I learned there that white people were going to have something to say if I wore my hair differently. But not what you think. A lot of what white people do is based on supremist ignorance. They wouldn’t trip about my hair as long as they could pity me for not having their hair. But it’s not the white people that made my 2nd natural hair transition difficult. It was the Black people. What Black people say and do to other Black people will always be more hurtful than what white people say and do. Simply because we have more intimate interactions with each other. Your white boss is not going to call you ugly to your face, but your family, friends and pastor will. Plenty of people with natural hair have jobs. But your own people will strive to convince you that natural hair = unemployableness. Your man will tell you he no longer finds you attractive. Hampton University will say you can’t attend if you lave locs. You can die a million little deaths amongst your own people because you decide to reject the mold. It can be way more painful than anything white folks can do.

I find having dreadlocks to be waaaaaaaay easier. People are more accepting of locs on women than plain natural hair. I think it’s because locs can grow long and women are supposed to have long hair.

A smaller but equally difficult choice was the choice to stop wearing pants. Now NGE cannot claim that their teachings taught me to not wear pants. Nor can Christianity take credit for this. A plate glass window on Euclid Ave in Little 5 Points got that credit 10 years ago. I had on jeans, boots and a sweater. I saw my reflection in a window and I realized that the jeans gave anyone with vision, an 87.6% accuracy to what I look like naked. It’s not that particular pair of jeans either. Women’s pants are not ever as saggy as men’s pants. They are usually fitted from waist to hip, and most down to the ankle. If a woman is wearing pants, chances are they will show her form. I’m not okay with that. Months before my pastor at the time made a comment about my intention while I was wearing a different pair of jeans. He was sporting an obvious erection that he blamed on my outfit. He didn’t apologize. He said it was my fault. I do not advocate the practice of blaming the victim for the feelings and the actions of the perpetrator, but I realize that I may have some minor culpability in the exchange. Besides, folks shouldn’t get to view the goodies unless they are qualified.

Why was this so difficult? The current world we live in, kind of requires women to wear pants. Inclement weather, yard chores, outdoor activities, etc. Do I want to be a house hermit? I only own a certain kind of pants. 2 pairs of jeans 1 utilitarian pair for snow or doing something really dirty. And another pair because I paid more than I should for them and I’m not getting rid of them. It’s like finding Jordans at the thrift store. Not on my dime. And I own exercise pants that I work out in. I suppose I could run in a skirt… but I’m not. Chances are when you meet me, I’ll have a dress or skirt on. And do you know what? Folks don’t even notice unless I make Knowledge Born. When I’m in meetings and folks ask me to tell them something they don’t know about myself, I always say, “I don’t wear pants.” Even people who have known me for years are surprised.

The next big independent decision I made was to leave Christianity. This was the absolute most painful and scary of any decision I have ever made. I had been taught and had internalized that I was nothing without the mystery god. If Christianity wasn’t working for me it was because of my own innate evilness (I have more evil because I’m a woman) and I needed to get right with God. I have been “born again” 6 times that I can count. Ach time more drastic than the previous because clearly I hadn’t prostrated myself enough the last time since I backslid. After my husband died… I literally lived in my house, tithing, fasting and praying, only venturing out to go to church and work. In the words of Angela Windbush… This ain’t living.

I stared by looking for other religious options. I hadn’t quite come to the realization that it was religion that was the problem. I bounced from the Moors to the Wiccans, to the Ausar Auset Society. Where I found something in all of the programs useful, as a whole it was the same as Christianity. I wasn’t about to learn a whole new system for something I had already rejected. Even when I came to NGE, I was approaching it like a religion. I treated Supreme Math, Alphabet and 120 like it was the Bible and my enlightener like he was a prophet. I was literally afraid to let go of the mystery god’s unchanging hand. And that’s what it is. No matter what religion you find, it is always the same rhetoric. A friend of mine who is the New Birth cult said to me, “You can’t serve two masters. You need to get it together and repent of your sins and go back to Jesus. Stop fooling around with this other stuff. You know better.” And she was right, I did know better. I knew in my being that I was done with church. I had to just physically let it go. And imagine how much more I’d have to give up this time to get ‘born again.’ There was a lot of crying and sleepless night, but do you know what? It’s been 8 years and that lightening bolt never came. I have had trials and tribulations, but so has everyone. I have had joys and triumphs, and so has everyone else. What I don’t have is the illusion of someone pulling my strings. If I want something, I need to figure a plan and go get it.

Being part of NGE Culture I choose to wear my head covered in some aspect. I know not all Earths cover their heads full time. But I do. Every day when I leave the house, I have something on my head. Whether it’s a hat or a wrap. I’ve even done doilies. It is a rare occasion that I don’t have something on my head. I made that choice at the beginning of my lessons. If my boss knew that there was an option to me covering my hair, he would choose and option for me; and it would be the option HE wanted. I refused to give him that power and took the decision out his hands. Since then, I have come to love the wrap. I don’t feel restricted at all by wearing it. I love that it puts my ‘differentness’ right put front for every one to witness. I was self conscious at first but I got over it. I am a visual representation of NGE wherever I go. Folks look at me and say…. “Hmmmm… I wonder what’s going on over there.” And they treat me with the respect of someone they haven’t figured out yet.

When making a change I find it best to employ the scientific method. Conceive the idea, develop a plan, work the plan, collect data, look objectively at the results and make a determination about whether your experiment was successful and whether the result is useful in your life. Works every time!

And most importantly, don't be scared to do something that is right for you.


Friday, May 2, 2014

I'm Grown


I’m Grown.

Now I recognize that I need to define the word “Grown.” Yes it is a common word, but clearly every one doesn’t use it the same way I use it. My definition of grown is a sentient adult who is capable and actually is making their own decisions. A grown person makes their own choices for whatever reason and accepts the consequences of said decisions/choices. A grown person handles their own business and doesn’t rely on others to do what they are supposed to be doing.

Example: If a Grown person cannot afford to take a vacation then they don’t. They don’t ask another to foot the bill. Another Example: If a person (willingly) does something foul and negativity results… they accept it without complaint. That’s being Grown….

Grown people get to do as they please and will always accept the consequences of their actions.

Grown people know how to mind their own business.

Grown people handle their OWN business

Grown people know their own flaws and CHOOSE to either work on them or leave them where they are.

Notice... I have not said that Grown people are nice people. Being nice is a choice. And Grown people get to make their own choices.

Grown people don’t cry over negative results of choices they make.

If you aren’t doing the above… you are not Grown. And if you aren’t Grown you are a sniveling baby who must be taken care of by another. Now if that is your aspiration it’s your choice, enjoy. But don’t get salty when other grown people disregard you. There is no reason to show regard to a baby.

Now… I have a God whom I respect. We have a functional partnership. Sometimes he asks me to do something and I acquiesce. That does not make me less Grown. When he asks me to do something, he always gives me information (Knowledge) and a reason (Wisdom) so that I can make a decision based on Understanding. I do a lot of what my God asks. But that is a choice that I make to do this. I am not being forced or reduced to a sniveling baby. Because I’m Grown.


Thursday, May 1, 2014

Raising the Rod 2014


It's may and in my tree we have a tradition called "Raising the Rod." I thought I had built on this before in this blog.... but it was another one. I have a bunch of blogs all over the interwebs, it's hard to keep track of where I put everything. So I am going to post that Build on this site.


Peace Good People!

All of y'all that's following my journey, and I appreciate it, not one of y'all have asked, "Serenity what is Raising the Rod?" What? Y'all already know? Well, for those of you who don't know, meet Precise Infinite Peace Allah.... My Educator and my God. Since I got this from him and he got it from his Educator and so on and so on..... From my perspective he is the best knower of what and how we do. Precise.....

Peace to the Nation of Gods and Earths and all the positive people of the universe.

I come in the righteous name of Precise Infinite Peace Allah and I've been asked by the Earth to share a little with you about the tradition of "Raising the Rod." Raising the Rod is a tradition which has it's origins in our nation all the way back to when Allah was sent to Matteawan State Hospital, circa 1965-1967. While there, Allah had a particular dream one night and from that dream he drew up the determined idea of instituting restraint and discipline among his young Gods so they could better maintain functional relationships with their women. He drew up the dream to be a symbol of deception and therefore petitioned his young Gods to fast from females during the month of May, females who they were not "married to in the mind."

Through the years the tradition of Raising the Rod has developed into abstaining from more than just women. It has become a time of abstinence from anything which might be deemed excessive by the individual, very much like how Muslims engage in their annual religious time of fasting called "Ramadan." I don't know this as an actual fact but if I were a betting man I'd put money on First Born Prince having something to do with the expansion of the tradition. He was proficient at drawing up the best part.

Ever since I began walking through 120 with my educator I've observed the tradition. I've never abstained from women while Raising the Rod because the women I've been with have all been my Earth. Serenity is no exception. In this regard the original intent of the tradition has been of little importance to me and had I been around, in Allah's Day, I probably wouldn't have even observed the tradition if things were the same for me as they are currently.

In the here and now though I totally embrace Raising the Rod. It's a time of year in which I focus on showing and proving to self who the Master is. Things I fast from during the month of Master Allah Why are food (I usually begin the month with a Master Cleanser fast), Television, Radio and even casual interaction with people. Raising the Rod is "me time," a time for internalizing, and it's very much about letting things go so I can take on and take in new things.

What about the females? I've never heard of any women so-called "Raising the Rod." It has traditionally been a "God" thing and a female with a Rod isn't a female at all.... ha ha. I feel for the females though who'd like a similar tradition for their own personal edification. If my daughter, sister or Earth came to me and told me they were falling victim to the Divine I See King, I'd be the first one to tell them to fast from it. I ain't had no dreams about this like Allah did so I'll just shoot from the hip (like I normally do). A cool name for a tradition based on the Queens & Earths doing their thing would be something like "14,000,000 mile Journey," "Traveling the desert," or "Equality Observance" (all symbolic to the Equality degree of the Actual Facts). Tell your friends you heard it from the God Precise first..........

I've purposefully left out some details of Raising the Rod because it is a tradition in my tree. For this reason alone, I only pass on the story in its entirety to my fruit. If you want to know more you'll have to search for it. It's out there. The fundamentals are here though and the next time you hear of "Raising the Rod," you'll have a better idea of what's being discussed.


My personal Cee on RtR, for me as a woman and Earth, is that this is an opportunity for me to become a better person via encouraging positive habits and pruning away bad ones. A mental and possible physical Spring cleaning. So.... What I am going to labor to do is.....

1. Daily recitation of 120
2. Gut healing practices.

When going through 120, I used to recite the degrees I had every day. I noticed that when I moved on to a different lesson set the previous ones got murky. I wanted (and still want) to be sharp with my degrees. Once I earned my flag, I'd still recite them but just not every day. Now I will go through them right before the Parliaments or on road trips. That's not Peace. I can still quote my degrees, but pulling them up at a finger snap is not so easy.

Also having 120 is just not about the ability to recite. When I take my trip from Knowledge to Pluto, something always jumps out at me that I need. To only go through this once a month keeps me from those 'epiphanic' moments that make me a better person. Time to get on the good foot.

I suffer from chronic conditions (iron anemia, eczema) that are both at the same time linked to bad intestinal flora (Leaky gut syndrome). It's important to approach a condition at the root rather than just managing the symptoms. Most people only care about the symptoms; consequently that's why that is the only thing that gets attention. My father used to have stomach issues, but his manifested differently and I never really thought that we shared this condition. We had different symptoms. My brother had gastric bypass and found that he had the same condition my Daddy had. Which would stand to reason that I also have it. I refuse to be tested. That medical database is real. Since I am a doctor, I feel comfortable in self management and monitoring of the condition. So here is the plan.... I will will limit my consumption of gluten, caffeine, chocolate (not cool) and sugar. Restrictions alone won't allow my body to heal herself. My plan also includes supplementation with intestinal healers like slippery elm and aloe vera. Also I'll strive to improve the flora with Kombucha and other probiotics. The goal is to have optimally functional intestines that take up iron and keep their contents.

Healing of my eczema won't be noticable before next winter, but I'll be able to test my blood to see if my iron uptake has improved come June