Friday, December 3, 2010


Peace Family

I subscribe to butt load of blogs. Nation, cooking, sewing, life and such. And one of my subscriptions posted a build on the new movie "Colored Girls..." by Tyler Perry. I saw the Original play, read the book and was on the fence about the movie. Tyler Perry has this Christian edge to his movies that I don't like. He's a big time now and doesn't need the ground support that I gave him when he was just getting started.

I suspected that this Original blog author was going clown the movie as Black men tend to do. But he didn't. I was shocked... pleasantly shocked. He said that women would leave this movie with a feeling of supportive sisterhood. Meaning that the movie reinforces the reliance of Black women on other Black women. But this is what he said that threw me. He said, and I'm paraphrasing, that this type of feeling would not lead to the reconciliation between Black men and the Black women.

I know there is a genre out there that makes Black men look bad. Movies and books like The Color Purple and Push/Precious shows Black men at there absolute worse. I have built with Black men why they take such issue with said movies and they say it is because they show them in such a poor light and it's usually at the hands of women that this is done. They feel betrayed by us. Some of the story should be kept hidden so the look good to the rest of the world. That's a load of crap. I see that as "hit dog will holler" syndrome. Black women are portrayed as whores, sluts and money grubbing bitches according to the Hip Hop industry. Women holler all day long for them to stop and they don't. Stop using the argument that only the good stories need to get out there.

I am an advocate that Black men and women need to come together. But it's not women preventing this. And it's not slavery either. I have noticed first in the Christian community now in the so-called conscious community, that when reconciliation is called for, all the sacrifices are asked of the women. Western Black women need to re-check their attitudes. Western Black women need to learn how to be submissive. Western Black women need to open up to polygamous relationships. Why is it all the sacrifices have to be made by the women?

Let me make a bit of knowledge born.... Western Black women still have options. And we know this. We have been holding things down for generations. You offer us nothing in exchange for these sacrifices. We are the most attractive women on this continent. We will still be in relationships and still make Original babies regardless to whether or not western Black men decide to partner with us permanently. So that so-called compromise is not going to work. With those being the only options, I have to ask if you even want it to work?

I'm not sure, but I don't think it's Black women that stopping the reconciliation. I don't think it's Black men either. I think we don't know what we want. We aren't clear of what makes a good functional relationship. We have bought too deeply in the American dream of lust, romance, affection and happily ever after. Those are fairy tales. In my mind, I compare this to the civil rights movement. Folks fought and died for the right to do the things white people did thinking that that would make them happy. It didn't. It wasn't and still isn't right and natural for us. The same principle is applicable to relationships.

I see nothing wrong with arranged marriages. Those folks don't go into the contract (and that's all it is) with the expectation of a fairy tale. They recognize that marriage/relationships are one of mutual respect and they aren't easy. I have been married and as much as I loved my late husband I had a plan to kill him and hide the body. But we had made a commitment that we would stay together. And we did. I now have that same type of commitment with the God. It ain't always easy. It ain't always gonna be easy, but we have agreed to be celestial.

So bring it to a forum, a round table discussion and underground movement. I'll be there taping it and putting it on YouTube.


PS: Here is the link to the Original Post....