Saturday, April 17, 2010

Haters Beware

I like fashion. Not only do I like to look good, I take steps to make looking good a reality. BUT.... I get a lot of hate from other women. Not so much so from men. Someone would say boobs take care of that. I’d like to think there is more to it than that. Maybe men care less how I do myself than women. I have not made it secret that I embody 6 sextillion tons.... unapologetically and shamelessly. I find it incredibly interesting (though moot) that other women either have a problem with my wardrobe or seem shocked that I have stylish clothes t wear every day. And I do.

There are sites dedicated to fashionable plus sized women. There are other sites dedicated to larger women and the people who love them. The average American woman is 14-16. (Don't believe me? Google it) So I’m average. But them smaller women have beef.

First, I'd like to squash the “I’m unhealthy” thing. Not everyone is meant to be a size 6. I’ve been a vegetarian for the last 10 years. I walk 1.5 miles daily in my commute to work. I climb over 100 steps with a quickness during that same commute. I have a car, but I take mass transit because it is the right thing to do for the environment. I have no health problems outside of my eczema. Eczema is not weight related. No high blood pressure, no diabetes, no heart disease, no joint problems, no asthma. None of the obesity related illnesses that folks tend to have. My own family has these ailments. I don’t. And I am passed the age where they first began developing them.

So why are folks so shocked when I look good? I have no clue? I manage to find stylish clothing in my size (especially since it is one of the average sizes). I also sew. But most importantly, I innovate. If I see something I would like to wear, I find a way to make it happen. If there is a trend that may not look good on me that I admire, I take the best part for me and use it to my best interests. I know what works on me and what doesn’t. I won’t wear clothes that don’t flatter me.

But that is not all of it. I primp at home so that when I walk out of doors, I KNOW that everything is on point. From headwrap to shoes, everything is intentional and just the way it should be. Now I don’t have to dwell on it. I see women all day pulling and adjusting and arranging themselves. Me? Not so much. I am confident that the effort I made prior is enough to carry me through the day.

My father used to impress upon me the need for a woman to be beautiful on the outside. My mother impressed upon me the need for a woman to have more than her looks to carry her through life. Looks are fading. I have taken the best part from their lessons and come up with my own philosophy. Confidence and Comfort. I own that! I work what I have, but don’t fully rely on my appearance to carry me through. I recognize pretty women get certain perks. I would be lying if I said I’d prefer to be unattractive or that my appearance didn’t matter to me. But I bring more to the table than just a pretty face. And I admit that I work harder at it than thinner women. I have to. But I make no apologies for my effort or the result. And any woman who feels uncomfortable with the result that is “Serenity” should really look at her ownself. More than likely she is neither comfortable or confident in something within herself and she is projecting.