Relationship Complacency

"Cater 2 U"

[Verse 1 Beyonce]
Baby I See You Working Hard
I Want To Let You Know I'm Proud,
Let You Know That I Admire What You Do
The More If I Need To Reassure You, My Life Would Be Purposeless Without You (Yeah)
If I Want It (Got It)
When I Ask You (You Provide It)
You Inspire Me To Be Better
You Challenge Me For The Better
Sit Back And Let Me Pour Out My Love Letter

Let Me Help You
Take Off Your Shoes
Untie Your Shoestrings
Take Off Your Cufflinks (Yeah)
What You Want To Eat Boo? (Yeah)
Let Me Feed You
Let Me Run Your Bathwater
Whatever You Desire, I'll Aspire
Sing You A Song
Turn The Game On
I'll Brush Your Hair
Help Put Your Do Rag On
Want A Foot Rub? (Yeah)
You Want A Manicure?
Baby I'm Yours I Want To Cater To You Boy

[Chorus]
Let Me Cater To You
Cause Baby This Is Your Day
Do Anything For My Man
Baby You Blow Me Away
I Got Your Slippers, Your Dinner, Your Dessert, And So Much More
Anything You Want Just Let Me Cater To You
Inspire Me From The Heart,
Can't Nothing Tear Us Apart
You're All I Want In A Man;
I Put My Life In Your Hands
I Got Your Slippers, Your Dinner, Your Dessert, And So Much More
Anything You Want, I Want To Cater To You

[Verse 2 Kelly]
Baby I'm Happy You're Home,
Let Me Hold You In My Arms
I Just Want To Take The Stress Away From You
Making Sure That I'm Doing My Part (Oh)
Boy Is There Something You Need Me To Do (Oh)
If You Want It (I Got It)
Say The Word (I Will Try It)
I Know Whatever I'm Not Fulfilling (Oh)
Another Woman Is Willing (Oh)
I'm Going To Fulfill Your Mind, Body, And Spirit

I Promise You (Promise You)
I'll Keep Myself Up (Oh)
Remain The Same Chick (Yeah)
You Fell In Love With (Yeah)
I'll Keep It Tight, I'll Keep My Figure Right
I'll Keep My Hair Fixed, Keep Rocking The Hottest Outfits
When You Come Home Late Tap Me On My Shoulder, I'll Roll Over
Baby I Heard You, I'm Here To Serve You (I'm Lovin It, I'm Lovin It)
If It's Love You Need, To Give It Is My Joy
All I Want To Do, Is Cater To You Boy

[Chorus]

[Bridge Michelle]
I Want To Give You My Breath, My Strength, My Will To Be Here
That's The Least I Can Do,
Let Me Cater To You
Through The Good (Good)
The Bad (Through The Bad)
The Ups And The Downs (Ups And Downs)
I'll Still Be Here For You
Let Me Cater To You
Cause You're Beautiful (You're Beautiful)
I Love The Way You Are (You Are)
Fulfill Your Every Desire (Desire)
Your Wish Is My Command (Command)
I Want To Cater To My Man
Your Heart (Your Heart)
So Pure Your Love Shines Through(Shines Through)
The Darkness We'll Get Through (So Much)
So Much Of Me Is You (Is You)
I Want To Cater To My Man

[Chorus Out]




Peace Y’all,

This build has been with me for a minute. I didn’t want to write it, because I know it will offend folks. But in my beloved Nation, we honor Truth regardless of whom or what. And what I write is the Truth as I see it. You don’t have to agree. And let’s be real, this is a blog. If you don’t like what I write, don’t read it. And feel free to comment. I ain’t scurred!

There is a phenomenon that afflicts women… (It afflicts men too, but in a different way. So different it would require its own build). I call it Relationship Complacency or RC. When a woman gets in a relationship she loses sight of the work she did to attain said relationship and becomes a slouch. If you are offended then it is a case of “hit dog will holler.”

When women settle into a relationship one of the 1st things that go is her appearance. And this happens for many reasons. Eating becomes social. And that causes you to gain weight. Or you feel like you no longer need to work so hard since you got your desired product. Maybe your man feels like you have to tone things down now that y’all all loved up. That last one concerns me. I have found in my Koran, that a man is proud of his woman most when there are other men are checking her out. When I got engaged to my 1st husband, I found it scandalous to eat dinner then breakfast with him. I gained a tuck load of weight and was oblivious to it. The sad thing was I had been on a savage diet and had lost a tremendous amount of weight before getting involved. But love skews your vision. I have never been able to get back to my ‘Air Force Fine’ weight. So I am freely admitting that I too, can fall victim to the RC.

As an Earth, I see other Earths falling into RC with this nation. Once we are in and find a home here, we fall Waaaaaaaaaaaay off. Most women come to this Nation through or because of a man. And the strive to please the man. 3/4ths is part of our Culture. For a lot of newborn Earths that can be translated as busted-ass-outed-ness. Not a good look. And I see how it happens. You go from wearing fitted body baring outfits, with high MAC or Fashion Fair, and perms to natural haired, long skirts with headwraps and clean faces. Yeah. You can get REALLY busted along that route. And the fact that the transformation is usually driven by men who have absolutely NO concept of the work that it takes to maintain beauty. Men think that it is all lazy and effortless. We just fall out of the bed looking gorgeous. No Suns. Beauty hurts. The longer you share a cipher with a woman, the day will come when she walks out of the bathroom with green mud and rollers.

I know many Earths. I was raised in NJ during the 80’s. For some reason Allah’s Garden Earths who read my blog assume I’m talking about them like I don’t know other righteous people. Whatever.

I prefaced this blog with a Destiny Child’s song. I don’t know if you remember the 2005 BET Awards. They performed this song by giving lap dances to Magic, Nelly and Terrance Howard. Before that time, the song ticked me off, catering goes both way and the way the ladies where singing it didn’t give me that impression. But then after truly giving serious and dedicated consideration to the lyrics, I see that this song assures a man that his woman won’t fall into RC. And lets be real, it’s a true fear for a man. That his fly assed woman will morph into a busted looking crud muffin.

Not to be accused of jaw jacking, I ask, what can we do about this? Just because you are Earth doesn’t mean you have to be frumpy. It doesn’t mean you have to rep the continent of Africa either. I’m going to suggest a really simple activity that helped me sort things out. I’m a girl and I like girly things. Magazines and Paper dolls. Cut out a woman’s form in a paper doll, and then go to cutting out different outfits from magazines. The reason I recommend the dolls is so you can see and monitor the proportion. There is nothing in 120 that says the Earth should be busted and outdated.

Currently Maxi dresses are in style, but that doesn’t always mean they will be. When they go out of style, when you continue to wear them you will date yourself. That’s not important to you? Great. But looking fashionable is something that a lot of women find important, whether 5% or 85%, hell… even the 10% want to look good! Find a way to cover your head that works in the corporate environment vs. educational environment vs. healthcare environment or what have you. We have to earn a living and there is no need to be or feel held back because you cover your head. If you wear pants, that covers 50% of your body. I’m assuming that you will wear a top with said pants and now your 3/4th is complete. Add a hat to refine even further. Pay attention to your skin. If you have acne; find a product to correct that. I never had moderate to bad acne so I can’t advocate anything. But I can advocate proper hygiene. Oral and other. Coordinate your clothes. Iron your clothes. Don’t wear something that needs to be repaired until it’s repaired. Get your eyebrows groomed. Uni-brows ain’t sexy. Wear perfume and high heels. Paint your toenails. Use lotion. Just because you have a long skirt o doesn’t mean you get to be ashy underneath. Slather Carmex on those lips. Breath mints don’t hurt. You still want to wear them bootie shorts with your ass hanging out? Then wear them for your man... at home. They say they don’t like lingerie; but when they tell you to take it off, it’s because it’s done its job, not because he doesn’t like it. Take time with your hair. Fix it up for your man. Yes you wear your head covered (some of you) while you are abroad, but the God deserves special treatment and goodies for your God and Earth time. Be that Chick he fell in love with. Read them lyrics chile!

Come on ladies! Let’s take back Jerusalem (our Gods) back from these 85% hoochies!



Peace

Peace to the Earth!

Peeeeeeeeeeace........


What does it mean to be “Earth” in Allah’s 5% Nation of Gods and Earths?

Oh it’s wonderful. I am so much more satisfied with my Culture now than I was when I was a Christian. Why? Truth may be a hard pill to swallow; but you never get sick from it.

I used to think (and still do) clergy got some sort of sadistic pleasure from telling you that you are fucking up. I mean if they are supposed to be the paragons of virtue, when do they get to let their hair down? When they Pray? Listen to gospel? Go to church? Clergy can’t or shouldn't do do clubs (really can you imagine being at the club and seeing your pastor in there?), can’t get their swerve on, can’t watch porn, can’t nothing. It’s all very stiff up in there. I remember a former pastor used to like to play the board game, Trouble. Really? Unless it was strip trouble, that is a plea for help. The only thing they have for fun is the finger pointing game and maybe some procreational sex with their duly appointed partner. Yeah…. G's and E's don’t roll like that.

We also advocate raw unadulterated Truth with no lube, sugar or cream. It may hurt when you are 1st getting used to it but after a few times you get a taste for it… even crave it. What’s better than being told to your face with no guile or ulterior motive, the truth? Whether it is pleasurable or bad, it’s nice to know that’s what’s coming.

Many 85 women (and devils) ask my why I like being an Earth or what does being an Earth mean to me? They think because the men are Called “Gods” that to be an Earth is somehow inferior…. No. Many would like for our women to be called “Goddess” to reflect our Equality to the men. But it doesn’t work like that. We have Equality. But Equality doesn't mean the same.

Using the terms God and Goddess implies that the only difference between men and women are our genitals. And that’s not the case. In order for this world to operate effectively, men have one role and women have another. Everyone doesn’t need to perform the same job. That is redundant.

Ridiculously simple example: The house needs a dozen eggs for dinner. I go to the store and buy a dozen and the God goes to the store and buys a dozen. With both of us having performed the same job who now cooks the eggs? If we both do for a meal we both share does not that seem like a waste of time and energy? That’s because it is. But if God or I buys the eggs and the other prepares the meal, then harmony and balance reign in the cipher. And at the end of the day isn’t that what you want?

Yes our Gods are misogynistic. I built about that last week. But it’s not always a bad thing. Misogynistic men get off on being men. This new breed of metrosexual man is too soft to handle the man jobs and actually will push a man job off on a woman. That is NOT a good look.

Example of metrosexual punk assed-ness: Years months and days ago –something year old wanted to be my man and do the grown folk. But he would punk out when I needed a MAN’s assistance. My toilet seat broke and he refused to put a new one on for me. When I went to put it on (and I always knew how) he said it turned him on to see me handle my business. Well I continued to handle my business… including the business he wanted to handle for me. A misogynistic man wouldn’t dream of me doing that type of work for myself.

I suspect a lot of the misogyny stems from this being a man-heavy movement. When men teach men they tend to pass on masculine type views and stereotypes. Doe it always work for me? No. But it works more than it doesn’t. And you know why it does? Because I’m a woman that recognizes that my femininity is not dependent on how freaky I can get in the bedroom.

Also women just tend to excel at certain thins and men others. A woman can hear her child call “Mommie” in a room full of children crying the same word. And some men just completely get the “providing without bitching” on a level that I as a woman cannot fathom. Yes I can provide for myself. But I will complain about it every step of the way, even cry about it. Men have this odd ability to go out and very stoically work and pay bills without drawing your attention to it. Women nurture and men provide. 2 completely different processes

Very Nice Example: I had to have major surgery. I was going to be out of commission for 2 months. I told Mommie, she got upset for me and vowed to be by my side and nurse me through it. And she kept her word. She nurtured me in her own way. Daddy inquired about how I was going to meet my expenses. Then sent me the money to cover it. He didn’t come to the hospital (he was in another state) but he made sure my lights stayed on. Who made the more important contribution? Women would say my mother and men my father. But they both came from 2 different places and they gave me what was from them to give. Could my mother have afforded to front me the money? Hell yeah! That woman is sitting on a Benjamin pile, but that’s not how she saw it. Could Daddy have come down and held my hand and walked me through the hospital halls? Yes! But he neither saw it like that. Men and woman are far more different then their genitals and yes they can perform the same functions but shouldn’t.

So does that mean that I see me as “Earth” as inferior to a “God”? Emphatically Now Cipher! (That’s no to the non-initiated). I see myself as the Supreme female being handling my woman square while the God is the Supreme male being handling his man square.


Peace

So?

Peace Family.

I’m just going to get down to business... Allah’s 5% Nation of Gods and Earths is misogynistic. Case closed. Was it designed like that? I doubt it. Should women even strive to be an integral part? Absolutely!

I assume that if you are reading this, you already know what misogynistic means. No? Then you googled it, right? No? Okay… Misogyny means hatred or distrust of women. Do I think the Gods hate women? Emphatically Now Cipher. But I do think many distrust women and more than half of the Gods just don’t know what to do with women.

I have noticed that where and whenever there is a preponderance of men assembled, the women are usually assembled somewhere else. Men will gravitate to men and women to women. I ain’t mad at that. I like nothing more to enter a cipher with my God and slip off to build with the Earths. Why? Many reasons. I have more in common with Earths. I feel safer; it’s doubtful a fight might pop off if an Earth misquotes a degree. The Earths respect each other and don’t patronize each other… Well most Earths. Ok, a lot of Earths. And the Gods can be too intense for my taste at times. It’s a sweeter vibe. So I’m cool with the temporary separation. But I recognize that anytime I want, I can go back to where the men are building. And the Gods can visit the Earths too, should they choose.

But I bare witness that many Gods don’t treat Earths with the same Equality as they do each other. I know 120 is not an Earth requirement. But there are lots of us that want (and have)120. For some reason it is very hard to get Gods to teach it the same way to women as they would to men. Maybe it’s because oftentimes said woman is the God’s own Earth. As an Earth that was getting 120 from both an educator and then from my own God, I know there is a difference. As it should be. But both Gods taught me hard. Another thing I recognize is that Earths are softer and gentler than the boys. If you ride us too hard we have no problem breaking down and weeping. Some men find that uncomfortable. Ok.

I wonder if folks recognize that misogyny will cause women to want nothing to do with our nation. Or maybe that is the determined idea. Doesn’t matter. We here and we staying.

I find the whole situation, actually quite funny. My father and his cronies were all male chauvinists of the highest order. But, he was my father! He did his duty as a father. So that means that when I needed him or something from him, I had to find a way to make him more amenable and user friendly. So I know how to work a man who doesn’t actually trust or respect women to my advantage. And ladies, it’s easier than you think! You know why? (a) Because the chauvinist doesn’t think women are smart enough to comprehend anything so they never see your work coming. (b) And it is very easy to use their antiquated views against them.

Example: When I was in college I worked for 2 years (junior and senior) year in a microbiology lab. My senior year I had ridden to the highest position a student could rise. I was in charge of the lab. The Principal hired a sophomore male who for me to train. He was a sophomore. He didn’t have my experience, seniority or all my classes. He was very green. BUT The principal saw fit to pay him slightly more than me. Really? I had to work up to my pay and this kid was going to make more than I did and I was his boss? Again, Really????? I promptly went to the principal and confirmed my information. The chauvinist explain very slowly (because clearly my vagina makes me stupid) to me that he was a man and deserved to make more simply because he had a penis. That’s all I needed to know.

I needed that job. I didn’t qualify for any other campus jobs, and it wasn’t a bad one. And I continued to work my program… BUT… Since I wasn’t a man, I told the principal that another man should train a man. His training took forever to complete. And he ended up getting shorted in paychecks when the principal had other things to do. Not my problem. Then I started to be late daily. Since I had worked their so long, there were things I wouldn’t show others how to do until the graduation invites had been sent out. My job was secured. I had a ball that year, coming and going as I pleased using woman’s issues as excuses. I had a blast. And never got one short paycheck! And I went to Daytona when the principal went on vacation.

So ladies you can have the misogyny work to your advantage. Now all the Gods reading this are probably pissed. And you should be. I’m advocating trickery in order to make my and others women’s lives easier. But it wouldn’t be necessary if the men weren’t misogynist in the 1st place. And women have every right to the truth and our part of Love, Peace and Happiness. Am I wrong?


Peace

Is my Refinement like your Refinement?

Peace Y’all,

I feels like blogging even though it’s a Sunday. I’m back obsessing over my 3/4ths again. I am uber curious about how other women do their modesty. I’m not necessarily trying to bite but every now and then I see something that makes me ponder. Earths in Allah’s 5% Nation of Gods and Earths don’t have such prescribed laws regarding our dress; just mind 3/4ths. Something tells me the 60’s and 70’s adherents were more concerned about drawing up Gods than how the women dressed. But 3/4ths does exist, and we can rock it however we cee it. And as long as we can show and prove, we should be fine. Still, I have to look…..

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tzniut This article describes how Jewish women do. Elbow to knee covered. No pants. Married women cover their heads. That’s how you know their married. Sometimes they accomplish this with wigs. There are some interesting points. Like kick pleats instead of slits and no bright colors.

http://jamaicanrastafarianlove.com/ Rastafarian women are essentially natural Afro centric Jewish women. They follow all the rules of the Old Testament so whatever the Levitical rules are, they follow them. But they do not adhere to the non color rule. Nope. They actually prefer African print. The women cover their heads as well. It’s not so easy to find a lot of good internet info regarding Rastas. Better to build with them in the physical.

http://mormon.lds.net/mormon-beliefs/mormons-and-modesty These are the Mormon rules for women. They have no special rules that would catch your eye. You probably wouldn’t be able to pick them out of a crowd of mid western white people. They really do blend in.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hijab Our Muslim sisters cover everything but the face and hands. Some say no colors and only black, others rock all kinds of color combinations.

http://larp.com/jahavra/clothing.html Lately, I have been into Gypsies. Maybe it has something to do with the TLC program that has caught my attention… My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding. According to that program these new Traveler women will wear damn near anything to catch a man. ANYTHING. And they are extremely suggestive in their activities. But the claim that they don’t act on all the suggestiveness. Okay. If they say so. But they do marry young. Some around 16 (28:40). So maybe they are telling the truth. It looks like a duck and walks like a duck, but it’s actually a gorilla. Anywho…. This link describes the more traditional what you think of when you think of a Gypsy woman kind of style.

Did I miss anybody?

And I’m back thinking about us Earths. We just have to cover ourselves with clothes as the planet does with water. It’s not so restrictive when you do the Knowledge. Other folks get dead or excommunicated if they don’t follow their rules. Us…. Not so much. So why do folks have such a problem with 3/4ths?

Insight y’all?


Peace