Monday, May 18, 2009

Nope! I Ain't Doing It!

My ole Earth… bless her heart… has always says to me, “Don’t be so quick to say what you aren’t going to do.” She never explained what she meant by that. She still doesn’t. I was and am good for saying it ALL the time. Since I was given Knowledge and Wisdom without Understanding, I have drawn up my own Understanding. Here Goes….

For the most part, when I say something, so it is. My Daddy was really good example. If you asked him for something, unless it was small and unimportant it was unlikely that he would answer you right then and there. He would insist on time to consider the request. If he said yes, then it was yes. Regardless of whom or what. If he said no, then it was no. Ditto. If he said let him think about it, you’d better or else he will just say what was needed to extricate himself from the decision. And once extricated there was no reconsideration. He refused to be pushed. Now… If he forgot… then that error was always in your favor. He would give in. And he always freely admitted that he wasn’t perfect.

Lately I have noticed that I have been saying a lot of “I ain’t nevers” and “I’m not gonna do’s” only to have to go back and eat those words. I should be ashamed, but actually I’m not. Not all of the expectations have turned as I thought. I said when I joined this Nation (this time) (a) I was NOT going to date God even if that meant being alone forever. (b) I most certainly was NOT going to get 120 from a God that wanted to make me his Earth (c) I was getting at this life for me and no one else and especially (d) I ain’t repeating these lessons or changing my name for NO-Damn-Body. I could go on. I made a lot of negative declarations. All of which I’m eating now. But guess what? I ain’t shamed. Tastes good. Like Kettle corn. Surprisingly sweet with the expected salt.

So Mommy… I see what you mean. I suppose going back on loud statements is probably not something I want to consistently do. (11:14) But when shown the error of my ways, what else is left to do? And maintaining rigidness will only break me. I suppose I should be more flexible and hold off on the rash declarations. Or at least keep them marinating so they will be tender when I go back and eat them