I'm that type of girl....

Peace.

I’m a girl. Actually a girly girl. I like everything pink and fluffy and florals and kittens and animal prints and shopping and girl stuff. Sugar and spice and everything nice! But… I’m not a pushover type of woman.

I wasn’t always girly. I grew up in the house with a brother and 2 uncles. Other than my mother I was the only girl... The baby girl at that. My mother worked a lot and I spent an inordinate amount of time with men. And not just the family, but their friends too. Had you asked me what I wanted to be when I was a little girl, I would have told you, “a boy!” And that makes sense when you consider my male socialization process. I didn’t play with Barbies much (Because G.I. Joe beat Barbie up and I didn’t want to play with such a punk doll). But when I started liking boys… and there was a collective sigh of relief from my family… I started appreciating the value of being a woman.

The older men in my family are all misogynistic. VERY Misogynistic. I am really surprised I’m not a doormat. But when you live in a prolonged situation like that, you learn to take the best part AND you learn how to manage the situation. These men really felt like because they had penises they should have certain caveats, like me fixing their food and washing their clothes, cleaning up after them and me looking put together at all times. But when a man asserts himself in a SUPER masculine way, he must accept all that comes with it. If you are going to be the male boss… then you must PAY for the luxury. That is Equality.

I will cook and plate your food… but you must compensate me for it. And if I lack an ingredient, you/man stop what you are doing and go to the store to purchase more. I WILL NOT use my own money to pay for household expenditures. You are the man? You are SUPPOSED to provide. I never lifted a finger to do outside work and I expected and got money when they got paid. When I was in the store with them, I never ever reached for cash. Because these men paid the cost to be the boss. As long as you are the boss and we aren’t partners…. This is what you get.

Men these days want that same good treatment from women, but they don’t want to pay for it. They go as far to call a woman a prostitute wanted to be compensated for things she does for a man and they cannot even install a ceiling fan or don't own tools to put together a bookshelf. I can’t... And I won’t. I have never bought into the ratio okeydoke. You know the one that there are 50-11 women to every man. If a man says that to me, he can leave. I have never been lonely. I have always had a man when I wanted one and they always take care of me… Because I take care of them. That’s the principle of EQUALITY at work.

I have said all this to preface my next point… Our Nation is not a woman friendly Nation. Precise says closer to the root folks have more love for women and you see more women but the further away you get, the more likely you are to see imbalances in the God:Earth dynamic. He may have something there. He's so smart.... I grew up around Gods and Earths and I never saw polygamy or Gods beating the brakes off their Earths or sexual misconduct or any of that. I always thought Gods were stand up kind of manly men. But now a days… IDK anymore. It seems like Gods have a big problem if a 85er is mistreating an Earth… But only an Earth. AND… If a God is mistreating his own Earth, I see nothing happening from the Cipher at large when they know. You can argue against this… But this is what I see. I know women who claim this Culture but won’t step foot to a Parliament because they don’t want to be exposed to violence and foolishness, nor do they want their children exposed to the wilding behavior.

Gods outnumber Earths in this Nation. Why is that? In most other coed Cultures there are usually more women than men. Many of the Gods are super aggressive. This can frighten women away; but it doesn’t frighten me. I grew up watching pissing matches amongst men. And unless you are my man, you don’t get to intimidate me or boss me around. But that perspective is lost on a lot of women.

So here is my question…. Do the Gods need to become kinder and gentler or do the Earths have to man up?


Peace

Knowledge your Equality

I was riding the bus this morning with a friend of mine who was complaining about his son's lack of street smarts. He says that his 20 year old son makes a lot of careless errors. And has him (father) questioning the son's maturity. He says his son has not gotten his driver's license yet and leaves his cell and wallet around indiscriminately. The son takes chances that he would prefer him not to, like taking rides from strangers and walking these dark Georgia roads at night. Real talk y'all: there are no street lights along the road from the bus stop to his front door. The whole time he was speaking to me I was thinking about today's Supreme Mathematics of Knowledge Equality abbt God. This is a youngster who has yet to Knowledge his own Equality.

The 28:40 degrees speaks that Yacub's followers would marry by age 16. 16 is the age of consent for sex with other minors. 16 is the age that children here can get their driver's licenses in a lot of states. 16 is the age where churches want you to either join or request baptism. 16 is the age where a lot of Gods and Earths expect there children to made a decision about whether they plan to live our Culture. 16 is a very important age. It is at this age you have completed your mental dependence on your parents and now you must stand on your own square. You are leaving one Cipher and entering another. It is the age where you claim your birth right as God or Earth by acknowledging your own Equality.

It seems now a days that there is an epidemic of children who mange to make it to adulthood with little or no maturity. Who shall I blame? Society? Schools? Parents? The economy? The answer is a little of everybody. Polite society sends the message that the world is too hard and too violent for parents to send their children into. And it might be, but this is the world that these children will have to live in. It was different for us than it was for our parents. And so will it be different for our seeds. But just because it frightens us does not mean that we have the authority to handicap our children.

Schools have removed all accountability from children?s shoulders. If a child fails, it's not them who failed it was the teacher, school district or parent. No child left behind is a joke. Some children need to be left behind. Failure may be painful, but it teaches valuable lessons. These children reach maturity after having been taught the whole time they are in school that the world will be concerned about them, and get disillusioned with reality. This is how snipers are born. When you are grown there is no one to blame or who cares.

Yes this economy is not good for young people to go out into the world, but they have to learn how to maneuver ir sometime. My best friend while growing up had a mother who did absolutely everything for her. She never did a lick of housework, never had to work, never had to walk to school, never cooked, couldn't fight, couldn't do her own hair, couldn't do anything. I was jealous of her and was not shy about telling my mother. My mother told me I was going to be more prepared for the future than she was. And my mother was right. My friend's mother died as soon as she graduated from college. My friend snapped and went a little psycho. She didn't even know how to write a check or that the due date on bills is not just a suggestion. Her mother had planned and paid for her own funeral. Even left the dress and wig at the funeral home and picked out her own casket, bought her own plot and wrote her own obituary. All my friend had to do was show up. To this day, this chick is sketchy. There is a whole lot that she has had to learn late. All the rest of us know how to do xyz and she is still working on lmnop. She has latched on tight to a man that does a lot for her. And she is frightened that he will leave her. I suspect her fear is not him leaving her because he no longer loves her, but that she still doesn't know how to manage her affairs well.

So what do we do? The mission doesn't change. Through the process of civilization will teach these children to think for themselves. And we as the parents have to be better with giving our children no only privileges but responsibilities. It is better that they learn gradually how the world is rather than being all slapped upside the head by reality at once.


Peace

Equality

Today’s Supreme Mathematics is Equality. I see that to mean ‘balanced relationships; dealing fairly with people. The way it’s slapping me upside the head is how certain people expect from you what they are not willing to give.

If you know me in the physical, you know that I don’t have a good relationship with my mother. In fact it has been said that the two of us are like fire and lighter fluid. If we weren’t related, we would not be friends. I have taken the avoidance approach. Meaning I rarely visit, hardly call, and if I am forced to visit, I don’t stay overnight. My mother doesn’t like me either, but she will refuse to admit the fact. She, however, takes the direct opposite approach. She is confrontational. She constantly calls, (I don’t answer) and sends dirty emails, makes requests she knows I’m not going to agree too and tells anyone who will listen how I ruined her life. She often claims in anger that she should have aborted me.

One of her biggest complaints is that I don’t appreciate all that she has done for me. I mean what is that supposed to mean? Yes she took care of me. Isn’t that what mothers do? Am I supposed to spend the rest of my life trying to pay her back for something that she was supposed to do? I don’t get this. She made sacrifices. Don’t all mothers do that? She says that she stayed when my father left. Ummmm… She ran him off and he didn’t go away. My father lived walking distance from my home and I could see him any time I chose. Also, little known fact that she never mentioned…. My father continued to pay the mortgage until they officially divorced years later. My mother proclaims she paid for me to go to college. Correction. She paid for 3 semesters, my father paid 4 semester and I paid 1 semester (then my father paid me back). My parents made too much money for me to qualify for financial aid at that school.

I’m not trying to slam my mother. But she was not the perfect long suffering mother that she pretends to be. I will not accept the yoke that she puts on my back. I see other folks with their mothers. I know this is not normal. My mother is unreal in the requests that she wants. When I say no, and stand my ground, I get slammed not only between her and me, but through the entire family and up and down the eastern seaboard. I once met some one who upon hearing my name asked me if I was her daughter. When I confirmed the information this man proceeded to rip me a new one 5 minutes after meeting me. A woman, who once heard me sing, heard her speak at a different venue. She went over to my mother and asked her if she was my mother. My mother responded by saying, “What did she do now?” Come on, is that fair? She proceeded to tell this woman exaggerated personal information. And of course she spins it to make herself feel like a victim. Hell even writing this is pissing me off.

I don’t want to hear foolish advice like, “Why don’t you guys sit down and talk about it.” What you never thought in all my decades of life I hadn’t thought of that? If I had a dollar for every time I heard that bullshit statement, I could take a road trip around the world buying only high test for my SUV.

Oooooh…. And I hate folks that come at you like, “She’s your mother” and “You only get one” or “You’ll miss her when she’s gone.” Really? I don’t wanna hear that shit anymore. If you love and have a functional relationship with your mother, great! Y’all drink some international coffee and braid each other’s hair and be happy. Because you could have mine! If she is not willing to deal with me in Equality, I’m out.



Peace

Today's Mathematics: Wisdom Culture/Freedom abbt Equality

Today is Christmas Eve. This is my 1st time not celebrating Christmas. I’m moderately bummed about it. I like Christmas. But I do not adhere to the belief of a mystery god; therefore have to give up that ghost (pun intended). Wisdom is wise words and actions of Original individuals. And Culture/Freedom refers to our lifestyle and just being mentally free of BS. (Forgive me for paraphrasing) So as much as I love this time of year because of the holiday, I have to man up and stand on my square and say…. I don’t celebrate Christmas.

The action of not celebrating Christmas this year has been the cause of much meditation for me. Probably more so than others that don’t observe. I have been very careful not to demonstrate the outer trappings of a religious holiday. I loved the singing and the carols. This time of year I like going to church and seeing the decorations. I like decorating my own queendom. Then I found myself considering whether or not it would be apropos to incorporate the secular aspects of the holiday in my cipher. I’m still on the fence about that. Clearly this needs more consideration. It’s hard to ask others how they negotiate around things. I’m convinced that most Black people are paranoid. And when you start asking questions, no matter how innocently you mean them, they start shutting down on you. And got the nerve to get aggressive to boot!

We have everything we need within our culture. We have our observances and celebrations. We know better than to buy into this wilderness’ foolishness and devilshment. But I ain’t lying when I say that even though BS kills us as a people…. It can be quite enjoyable. But is that ‘fun’ worth what it does to us as a people, as a Nation? And even though I don’t celebrate this so-called holiday, I’m still going to take the best part. I’m going to take a paid holiday and the time off. I’m going to partake of the sales (so to speak). And I plan to visit with my family.

B.U.T. when all is said and done, you have to be able to live a life on you own terms and according to your own system. And that is my Equality.


Peace.